my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize