try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
