Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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