Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
