ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Randomize
