Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
