she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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