3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize