new low.... made out with someone while peeing
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
The power of my boobs compel you
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize