i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
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Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
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