I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
