id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize