I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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