Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize