It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
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