she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Enjoy the penises
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
