I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize