we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
