Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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