where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize