i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize