Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
where are you?
Hypothermia
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
