yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
