You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
