I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
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