just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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