The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
