i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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