Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
You're like the curious george of whores
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
