Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
