Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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