Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Randomize
