some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
