I think scott just propositioned me for sex
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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