woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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