Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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