I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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