Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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