Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
where are my eyebrows?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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