I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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