Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
