drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
