wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
