His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
