there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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