I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
