If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
This girl is more easily done than said...
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
