Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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