So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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