I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
